5-Signs Your New Love is Toxic
You’ve met this fabulous guy and things are moving quickly but is it too quickly. Are you headed down a path to heartache? Is his love toxic?
- I Love YOU within the first 2 or 3 times seeing him – this is a bad sign. It indicates obsession and control. If someone tells you how much they love you, can’t live without you or would die if you ever left, and you’ve known him for 5 minutes, RUN
- Continuous, Repeated, Ongoing, Rapid Fire – every 5 minutes – Texting or calling and expecting an instant answer. This also indicates the beginnings of toxic control and isolation. He will eventually remove you from your friends and family because he wants you to himself. Period.
- Answering the text or call and you are required to give an explanation for your tardiness in replying. You are headed towards disaster. Your explanations will never satisfy and eventually you will stop doing what you want because answering to him is too difficult and painful
- Sex as a weapon of guilt and shame. Toxic partners will tell you that not having sex when they want it means you do not love them and you are hurting their feelings. After all, they love you so much why would you hurt them this way? You lose your ability to say No. You begin to feel it’s easier to give in.
- Sex is taken! This is a serious sign and some women will make excuses when their partner forces sex on them. It was a bit of joke. I didn’t really say no. He always wanted to explore the rape fantasy. It’s been a while and he has needs. And so on. No excuses. If you say no, it’s no. If he forces himself on you it’s rape. Rape.
If your new love or an existing relationship is showing signs of being toxic, the only solution is leaving. I know that sounds harsh and sad, but the hard-core truth is that you cannot change your partner’s toxic behaviour.
Stop making excuses for the toxic behaviour and start making plans to leave. Yes, it will hurt but before you know it you won’t feel under pressure to explain yourself, you won’t feel tense when you know he’s almost home, and you won’t feel threatened or bullied.