Silent Signs of Narcissistic Abuse

The Undercurrent of Narcissism – Silent Signs of a Real Problem

Narcissism, Narcissistic Abuse and Trauma are becoming part of our awareness. We are becoming familiar with the overt warning signs that your new date is an abusive narcissist. But what about the subtle or silent signs, the ones that seem perfectly okay with an explanation. What about those signs? They are equally important when you are first navigating a relationship. Your new man may not have all the nasty signs but he may give you these subtle signs.

5 Subtle, Silent Signs of Narcissism

They break rules in small, consistent ways because they believe rules don’t apply to them 

People who feel entitled feel no need to go along with the rules of the household or relationship. You can’t quite put your finger on this, because they don’t openly confront or challenge you, but they slip in little actions that show they think they’re above everyone else. For example, you ask your new man to park in a certain spot and he will park wherever he pleases.

They change schedules and appointments for no reason

This is a truly big sign but it is a subtle sign because it happens, you write it off and go along, then it happens again, and so on. It takes time for you recognize the pattern and during that time, he’s working his other magical tricks on you. This one becomes easy to overlook as the bigger, overt narcissistic red flags begin to emerge. Asking people to reschedule, especially on short notice, is a subtle (and annoying) way for people to express their narcissism.

They communicate in “all caps.”

All Caps is their way of demanding your immediate attention. Right Now. No Waiting. And when you don’t reply with their level of expected urgency, they will unleash the hounds of hell for ignoring them when they Needed You. Demands on your attention is a red flag and communicating in all caps with lots of exclamation points is demanding your attention.

Asking for Your Opinion, thoughts, guidance and then ridiculing you

They love to ask you for guidance, and then not follow it. It’s a game to them. It is also a way to get inside your head and begin the process of tearing you down. They will ask for your opinion and then laugh, ridicule, or just give you that sick dismissive smile. Every time this happens, your self-esteem, self-worth, and overall emotional health is being diminished. And that’s what they’re aiming for – to break you down.

They feel everyone that serves them is incompetent

Out for dinner, paying for groceries, purchasing a burger at a fast-food joint, all of these will open up his negative opinion of your server. He will belittle them on their looks, on how they speak, how slow they are, what they’re wearing and so on. Every person who serves him is below him in his opinion. Not even good enough to be his server. Think about that! Because that’s how he feels about you.

These are silent and subtle and not to be ignored. If you’ve just started dating or you’re in a relationship with a guy who demonstrates these behaviours, you are headed down the path of narcissistic abuse. You are opening yourself up to an extremely unhealthy relationship and no amount of wishing, or hoping, or thinking you can teach and change him will work.

There is only one solution – Leave. Move On. You’re Worth It.


I’ve been where you are and I know how confusing and subtle these signs can be. I’ve helped dozens of women take the first bold steps to create a life they love. And I can do the same for you. Schedule your free VIP session and together we’ll create a plan to step into your courage and begin living free, fulfilled, and fearless.

Click this link – https://calendly.com/susanball/session – pick your day and time and we’re all set.

2019 is here and it could be your best year yet. Ready?

January 7, 2019
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